My in-laws found a beaver skull in the garage when cleaning out the hubbies grandma’s house. Immediately, they called and asked if I wanted it. I am not sure what I will do with it, but I said yes.
Being a Canadian, Beaver has symbolism to me. Spiritually though I have never worked with the animal. That may change, or this may just be something I keep as a reminder of home. Only time will tell.
It is beautiful. We will never know where it came from or how long it was there in the garage. For now it has a special place on my bookshelf while I ponder what I want to do with it.
I’ve been dreaming of magick again. I can feel bits and pieces of the dream, but they have faded away when the alarm goes off. I have not been sleeping well lately. My Fitbit lets me know I’ve been restless and I imagine that my dream self has been busy. I’ve been sick off and on again too. I was poking through my timehop app and realized that certain times of the year are just my sick times. I am grateful that I only get sick like once a month now, while in the past it was constant and went on for weeks and weeks. Exercise and lots of good food has helped with that.
I read something that made me sad earlier. It was yet another rant about Wiccans, by a fellow pagan. I understand why people rant. I know my faith is full of obnoxious people or overly out there people, but there are also some of us who are pretty normal. I get a bit tired of defending my faith, but I suspect that will never end. It doesn’t matter who or what, someone somewhere always has a bee in their bonnet about the way someone else practices their faith.
We all know I am pretty positive. That doesn’t mean I ignore the darkness. For those who know me well, know all about the demons I have faced, the shadows I have lived through and the shade of my belief system. I am positive because I want to be. Not because I am some sort of fluff monster, but because it makes me feel good to be full of joy and to look on the bright side of things. I can stare into the darkness and face the shadows. I’ve done it a good chunk of my life. I like balance. I’m not afraid to be angry and brood or be sad or to be joyful and silly. I follow my heart and do my best to keep myself balanced out.
Does that mean my faith is just about the light? No. I tend to not talk about the grittier parts of my practice here anymore. That is a choice I made due to circumstances in my life. I have other people in my life now and things I say and do publicly can cause them stress. So, I pick what I share here. If people are judging me based on my blog posts alone then they don’t actually know me at all.
I don’t teach the 3 Fold Law or the “harm none” rhyme. I think it is a nice little thing to think about and it looks so pretty on paper, but I don’t think my life needs to revolve around it. I have the heart of a warrior and a protector. My mama bear rage is amazing. If something needs to be dealt with, it will be dealt with. I don’t judge people for not following it, I don’t judge others for following it. Walk your path and do it your way, but don’t force others to walk the way you want them to walk.
I get judged enough by the Christians. I don’t really need to be judged by pagans too simply because I call myself Wiccan. Like all things, my flavour of Wicca is not the same as many other people. Every so often I ponder letting go of the term. I call myself a Witch as well and my personal practice outside my group is a very eclectic witchy/pagany/I don’t know what mix. But then I think “Why should I allow the people judging me define who and what I am?” So I carry on with calling myself Wiccan.
For now I continue to use the term. My coven is Wiccan, my trad is Wiccan, my personal practice a mix of things. I’ll be me and do my best to ignore those who are judging me.