Fallow Times and the New Moon

Fallow times can be a strange time. Every so often Bast will step back from my life and there will be a stillness in my practice. There is always the initial “Oh crap!” and panic when I feel the disconnect, but then I settle in and know that there is a reason.

Usually she moves back so that I can work with someone else for a bit, to learn a lesson or because I need my butt kicked into gear. Every time there is something that I learn from it, and every time she comes back and our connection is solid again. Eventually, she might vanish forever, but so far we have always been reunited.

It took a few weeks for me to really realize that we were entering a fallow time. I had noticed that Freyja was poking me more often, that signs from her were appearing all over and that distracted me a bit from the fact that I didn’t feel the closeness I usually did with Bast.

When I realized it, there was a sense that this was different.  I know there are several retrogrades occurring and we were heading into the new moon so the energy was strange, but I felt like I needed to really acknowledge this fallow time.

So I followed my intuition. I grieved in my heart for our separation and took many of my statues down to the temple space. I created an altar in the West quarter, covering it with a black cloth and then laid my statues and shrine items down on it. Then I covered it all in a beautiful blue silk cloth and said that when it was time everything would go back to where it belonged.

I sat with this feeling and felt the silence. I busied myself with cleaning my altar and redecorating for the season. I pulled out my pendulum and my tarot cards and began to work with them.

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I haven’t sat down to explore this new relationship with Freyja yet. She is definitely around, I found myself reading fiction books about her, and stumbling across memes and articles and all sorts of other things relating to her. 2 years ago I had told her that I wasn’t going to buy anything specific for her shrine until I knew she was sticking it out. She had requested roses and I said no, maybe later. This year my husband decided to plant a rose bush. One with big pink roses. “Well,” I thought to myself, “that is interesting.”

I have found myself putting on my winged scarf that makes me think of her. My amber jewelry has made its way into rotationmore often. Little things to remind me and nudge me. So we’ll see where this goes. I am proceeding slowly.

Leading up to this New Moon I have been really in synch with my intuition. I got to spend some time playing with divination tools and I have found myself slipping into my readings with ease again. My dreams are coming back as well, especially now that the little man sleeps better.

I’ve gotten my butt in gear and started my exercising again and I am trying hard to eat better. I am determined to teach my little man how to eat healthy and exercise so that he can live a full and active life. The only real way to do this is to lead by example. This moon has me thinking of health and living well.

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What are you goals this moon? What do you plan to manifest?

I am beginning to look over my Wicca 101 course and I have plans to create some videos so I can teach online. My goal is to teach again this summer: both in person and online.  If you are interested in my 101 keep an eye on my Facebook page for details.

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Moments of “Ah!”

The last few months I have been struck with inspiration. I’ve been crafting like mad and doing research. As I made another viking inspired piece of jewelry I paused and pondered. Was all this Viking inspired stuff from Freyja?

The hubby has some Danish in his background. He’s been joking about it a bunch. So much we decided to be vikings for Halloween. So I’ve been doing research and am remembering how much I loved to sew costumes back when I was in the SCA. I’ve been looking at jewelry and trying to find beads and all that.

While doing all this I also pulled out an old rune necklace and am working on fixing it. At that point I realized that I was also following several people from Europe on instagram who did a lot of Norse work. So I paused at that moment and thought about my Goddess.

Bast has always been the focal point. She is fine with Freyja, but I flat out said that unless Freyja was going to be sticking around I would not be going out to buy statues and things. Things got quiet for a while, but now I have this sudden influence on my life and crafts. I wonder if she is trying to let me know she is still around. I poured a shot of alcohol for her a few weeks ago and pulled out the small dish I had bought last year for her. I gave her some fresh water and left it at that.

So much has been going on in my life with so many changes that I have probably not been paying attention to the little pokes as well as I should. These things happen. I’ll try to be a bit more aware.

As I write this my desktop wallpaper also changed to the photo I took of some of my object I have given to her in the Shrine. Check, I’ll make sure to do a little meditating tonight to focus on her. It will be good to do a little work.

Happy Beltaine/Beltane/Mayday/Samhain

Whatever you celebrate today I hope it is a lovely day. We have sunshine and warm weather. I didn’t do much last night. I was sleepy and after a visit to the dr there wasn’t much time left in the evening. So I put out some oats and almond milk for the fey folk, poured fresh water for Bast and filled a glass with vodka for Freyja.

I lit my candles for a few mins and pulled a card. Most of my readings lately have been about me completing projects, or being near to completing a project and a reminder that I can handle any changes, that I can make my reality and that I have the power to do as I wish. These are good reminders.

I’ve been busy lately. The hubby and I both took a music class through March and April, I’ve been getting out to discussions and coffee meet-ups and we’ve been at the gym or out taking walks. I’m happy the nice weather is here. My music reading skills are rusty, but coming back after my ukulele class. I hope to keep practicing this summer to get stronger.

I have all sorts of plans for the summer and fall. I’ve been reading a book on organization and it is getting me inspired. I have multiple craft projects on the go. I want to get out and enjoy the weather. And of course take time to sit in my garden and enjoy it.

I haven’t decided yet if I will run a Wicca 101 this summer or not. I will probably leave that until June to decide. I want to look over and revamp the materials I have for the class and there are a few other things I need to dig out and look at as well.

We did a bit of magick at Ostara with the local community. I hope that the ideas we planted will take root and everyone will start to come together. It is always fun to meet a new person and see how their faith differs from mine and how it is the same. It is a wonderful chance for us to learn from each other. I’m pretty happy with the community events that have been happening and I hope to do what I can to help keep that energy up.

Today though I will focus on myself and my love. I pulled some energy down this morning and surrounded myself with a golden bubble of energy. I said good morning to Ra in the sky. I stopped to enjoy the flowers in the garden. After work I will take time for the hubby and I to relax and have some quality time. And tonight I will light my candles, meditate and work a little magick.

I hope you all find some time for self-love today! I have a May challenge for us all, but I am going to wait till later to post it. Be gentle on yourself and take a moment to smile.

Blessed Beltaine!

Meditation: Jan 31 2015 and musings.

I’ve been pondering a dream I had about a White Cobra that was a guardian of a mountain.  Cobras and snakes are often in my meditations and are one of my spirit animals. Those who have been following me for awhile may remember me researching winged cobras. I had one that was around for awhile, and I think it was Wadjet, but its hard to know.

So I had several people offer suggestions on the White Cobra and I have let it simmer in my mind. Last night I meditated as I drifted off to sleep. Tonight I dug back through my dream and journey diary and some threads are starting to maybe come together.

First though, last nights meditation.

I was about to head into my astral temple when Freyja stopped me. She handed me something that I thought was a staff, but then as she walked away I looked down and realized it was a gigantic skeleton key. I examined it but was unsure why she gave it to me. I took it with me into my space and hung it off a branch of a tree.

One of my snakes that guards the tree slithered out to examine it. The snake was long, white, with yellow markings. It wrapped around the key and proceeded to have a nap.

I sensed something behind me and turned to find a cow munching on some grass. I stared at it and headed towards it quietly. I reached out to touch the large curved horns on its head and pricked my finger on the tip of the horn. Some of my blood ran down the horn and I took my finger back. The cow continued to eat the grass.

I turned and saw that the grass was all turning to sand. I walked over to a round disk and said I would allow myself to be moved if this space prevented a discussion. I was moved to a desert. There was nothing around and the wind was blowing. A storm was coming up. I knew I would be buried alive by the sand, but I was not worried. I lay back and let it happen. I know that sometimes we must let go. As the sand buried me I fell through it and appeared in a black pyramid. The stones were dark, there was no real light.

I could see a long tunnel leading out of the center room, and could only catch glimpses of images on the walls. A voice echoed through the room saying one word. “Child”. I called out asking for some sort of hint as to who it was. A throne appeared with a dark figure on it. The head was a male lion, but then the mouth opened and the lion vanished and a different head came forth. Before I could figure out what the head was I was woken up.

Today I flipped through my journal.

The cow has appeared in my space before, but I had no interaction with it. I know lions have made appearances along with bone monkies and alligators/crocs. I had a dream before of getting a skeleton key tattoo on my back with a rose. Bast and Freyja have often appeared as I work with them. Cats of all types, panthers, tigers, kittens… and then all the snakes. Cobras, pythons… regular snakes… Once, and only once did Set appear in a dream. He used me with permission of Bast to pass on a message to someone I knew.

I don’t know what any of it means, but I will continue to ponder. I am often doing magick of some sort in my dreams, spells to protect, spells to heal, all sorts of spells. I am often battling things or tsunamis and twisters are involved. I think I will have to get more specific and ask for clarification before I sleep. For now I am going to pull out the Book of Doors and pull a card or two.

So, the first card that half fell out and thus needed to be pulled is Udjit ( Ta, #3). Snakes. Second card, Apet (Aah, #2). Hippopotamus, with a croc/alligator on her back. Kekiu (TEpli-Aui-Un #5) Frogs.

I’m open to thoughts.

My day

Its my day today. So I booked the day off work and have had a lovely time doing whatever I want. Of course, doing what I want has included doing the laundry, dusting and vacuuming the house and going out for a small walk. It’s strange how the simple things can please me. I don’t think I will have any cake this year, but I did get myself cookies at lunch.

If you follow my tumblr, instagram or fb page you will have had the flood of photo spam as I tided up my knickknacks and snapped random shots. I rearranged my dresser and all the little things on it as I dusted. Once I was done all the cleaning I had a good long shower and then, once I was clean and my house was clean I sat down to do a little magick.

The mess in my jewelry box. Pretty with all the colours.

The mess in my jewelry box. Pretty with all the colours.

I did the LBRP to recharge myself. I spent some time sending cleansing energy around the house to go along with the mundane cleaning. I danced a bit, played my drum and then sat down to meditate and visit the astral.  I did a little cleaning in my astral space as well to echo all I had done here. Now I feel I am starting my new year all fresh.

My Ladies were there. I spent some time chatting with them. At once point Isis appeared and ran her fingers through my hair. A braid appeared with 3 golden beads. I’m not sure what that means, but it was pretty. Another goddess appeared and shot a bow, and where the arrow landed an oak tree began to grow. Freyja danced with me and then sent me off to the woods to dance with the Horned One. My dancing God always makes me smile.

My animals were there and I spent some time with them before heading back to the center. Bast told me to pick my cards and then I stepped back into myself.

I’m not sure what my tarot cards are telling me, but I shall ponder as I stare at them.

Small space for the God. The fountains face makes me giggle.

Small space for the God. The fountains face makes me giggle.

This morning my FB page was flooded with sweet things. I am lucky. I am blessed with so many loving and kind people in my life. It makes me realize that even though I do have a few enemies I have far more friends and loved ones. And the reason I have all these wonderful people in my life is because I am a good person. Despite what a few naysayers may think. I have worked hard to cultivate goodness in my life and hopefully I can continue to do so!

ankhsI placed offerings in thanks. Water and Vodka are what I have been using lately. It works for me and apparently works for my Ladies and Lord. Everyone’s ideas will vary. Always go with what seems right to you. I try my best to stay out of most of the drama around, but I think everyone who knows me knows that my thoughts are pretty consistent. Do what works for you. Follow your path. BE you.

Sometimes I struggle with being myself. Sometimes I have moments where I feel like I have moved to the land of conservative. Slowly though, I am finding what makes me comfortable, pushing myself when it is needed and I change as needed. Growth is important. Being true to myself is also important. I’m finding my balance.

candleThis year has had its moments, but I am happy. I hope to continue to be happy, to be me, to grow, to find my spiritual moments, to inspire others, and to be supportive of my loved ones. The Wheel turns and I dance along my path with it.

 

Astral: Animals

This is a dream/astral post, full of the randomness that my brain puts together at night.

I step into my astral temple. The Lady is there and with her is another Goddess. Introductions are made and I am told she is there to help.

My spirit animals are there and the Lady pets them and tells me that they are mine. Then she tells me that more will come and take notice. As she is speaking my vision is shifted and all I can see is a black lioness head. It has yellow and white dots on its face. I can feel myself spin slightly and a strange feeling fills my stomach.

Suddenly I am no longer in my astral temple. I am swimming in an underground cave and around me are alligators. I panic slightly and try to shift forms. I fail, but a hippo nudges me from behind and I climb on her back. She swims me out of the cave and down a river. I stand on her back and realize I am covered in snakes. I gently untangle them and let them swim free in the river. I also recognize the space, I had been there before a few years ago.

The hippo climbs onto the beach and I hop off. I thank her and call her Mother Hippo. She nods behind me and I turn and walk up the beach into pebbles and shrubbery. The Lady is waiting at the edge of the desert. We talk and then she sends me back to my temple.

Freyja appears and draws a line down my face. She tells me to be fierce, and whispers other things to me.

I come back to my body.

Offerings

It was a long day and it is shaping up to be a long week. My husband is still healing and working through the pain of his back being all out of wack and things. I was fairly certain that my brain shut off randomly throughout the day.

I prayed a lot. For a gentle day, to just get through the next hour, to have the energy to do what needed to be done.

I promised offerings. When I got home I could feel it nagging at my mind. “Yes! I know! Let me get it ready!”

So out into the cold I went to pour an offering into the planters. Vodka tonight. And then a shot glass was left on the window sill for them to enjoy. I told Freyja I was sorry I had no statue or art work to represent her, but until I found the right thing, and was sure she was staying, then it was what it was.

Of course I then found myself browsing art work. But so far nothing has felt right. So we carry on as we are.